Horrible Histories (2009)
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Lawry Lewin as
Episodes 37
Episode 1
Meet an annoying French prankster from the Middle Ages, witness bizarre Aztec food on Historical Masterchef, see what happens when Queen Elizabeth I needs the toilet, and learn how not to impress a woman in Victorian times -a painful lesson in manners. The truth about Dick Turpin in song; certainly no New Romantic.
Read MoreEpisode 2
Some medieval knights discover the most disgusting way to attack a castle, the Saxons demonstrate the stupidest way to lose a battle, a Georgian goes shopping in a modern pet shop, and the kings and queens of England demonstrate how to remember them all, through the power of song.
Read MoreEpisode 3
A confused World War I soldier spends his first day in the trenches, William Wallace launches his music career as a rock rebel, Lady Jane Grey wins a frankly terrible competition, and the Welsh women of Fishguard defeat a French invasion without even trying.
Read MoreEpisode 4
An unusual Stuart highwayman doesn't always steal cash, a modern detective struggles to solve a series of murders in Emperor Caligula's house, HHTV goes undercover to prove allegations of cheating in Middle Ages jousting tournaments, and King George IV meets his dead relatives.
Read MoreEpisode 5
A Welsh prince from the Middle Ages has a very stupid death, King Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette go on Historical Wife Swap with some starving French peasants, a Tudor peasant gets a super-hot makeover from Historical Fashion Fix, and Queen Cleopatra sings about her femme fatale reputation.
Read MoreEpisode 7
Robert Walpole struggles to talk to England's German king, a Scottish sportsman attacks dead cows in the Highland Games, American inventor Paul Revere demonstrates his gunpowder toothpaste, and the Roman Emperors channel the King of Pop in their musical argument over who's baddest of all.
Read MoreEpisode 11
We rejoice in the odd marriage of Mary I and Philip II of Spain, whilst a pirate chef disgusts the judges on Historical Masterchef and a Stone Age man appears on Dragons' Den with his innovative inventions. Plus, the Victorian paramedics offer their bizarre medical advice to a modern patient.
Read MoreEpisode 10
Some WWI soldiers try some very unusual ways to cure frostbite in the winter. Plus, the not at all romantic movie starring William the Conqueror, the story of Aztec Emperor Motecuhzoma, and a strange Stuart doctor takes a snooze during the middle of a battle.
Read MoreEpisode 12
The people of Strasbourg literally can't stand still with 'Dance Fever', HHTV presenter Fearne Polyester reports from a bizarre Greek festival, two Celtic warriors hold a rap battle to see who is best at boasting, and King Charles II meets the man who tried to steal the Crown Jewels.
Read MoreSavage Songs Special
Savage Songs compilation. Featuring the hip hop battle of the boasting Celts, pop superstar Cleopatra, rock rebel William Wallace, the soulful Suffragettes, the funky Aztec priests, the crooning caveman, bad boy heartthrob Dick Turpin, pouting Richard III, the children of the Victorian workhouses, and the many, many, merry monarchs!
Read MoreEpisode 7
Emperor Napoleon plays in a very unusual chess match, a Victorian inventor builds an anti-seasickness ship with one small design flaw, a snowball fight breaks out at a public execution and the British army hires a dead tramp to defeat the Germans in World War II.
Read MoreEpisode 10
William the Conqueror has some trouble conquering the town of Ely, Greek philosopher Diogenes reveals his disgusting tactic for getting rid of people he doesn't like, a Saxon joins a modern dating agency and there is a surprise in store for the people on Victorian Wife Swap.
Read MoreEpisode 11
Dr Culpeper invites us all to his highly unhealthy health spa, a Crusader knight competes on Historical Masterchef, King John worries about all the internet haters and crooner William Shakespeare serenades us with his big band.
Read MoreEpisode 12
A Victorian woman books a ticket on a very odd railway, a modern patient is (mis)treated by a Roman dentist, Alfred the Great pitches a movie about his life, and a Greek geek competes on Historical Mastermind.
Read MoreSavage Songs Special
The Thinkers, Mary I, William Shakespeare, The New World, Luddites, Victoria and Albert, Mary Seacole, Natural Selection and RAF Pilots
Read MoreEpisode 3
The boys test their horsepower to the max on Stone Age Top Gear; Charles Dickens sings about his life and books; the Greek philosophers host weird dinner parties on Historical Come Dine With Me; and Vlad the Impaler reveals his horrible new plan for keeping out the neighbours.
Read MoreEpisode 4
Featuring the rather eccentric Georgian philosopher Jeremy Bentham; super-rich Roman politician Crassus raps about his blinging lifestyle; some unusual soldiers are recruited into WW2; and Johannes Gutenberg goes head-to-head with some monks on The Historical Apprentice.
Read MoreEpisode 5
Famous monk St Augustine struggles to introduce Christianity to Saxon England; Stuart diarist Samuel Pepys annoys the smartest men in Britain; we witness a daring escape from the Tower of London; and Joan of Arc's story is quite an unusual one for a teenage girl.
Read MoreEpisode 6
Queen Victoria's coronation doesn't go quite as planned, George IV pulls out all the stops to impress his guests on Historical Come Dine With Me, ancient Greek bighead Alexander the Great refuses to stop conquering things, and the HH Sport team report live from the horrible pirate races.
Read MoreEpisode 7
Roman emperor Caesar Augustus reveals the lazy secret of his success, TV's most excitable reporter, Bob Hale, explains the very, very complex history of WW2, we meet Georgian England's most forgetful vicar, and Welsh hero Owain Glyndwr takes on the English in battle.
Read MoreEpisode 8
The surprising identity of Britain's top-scoring footballer is revealed, things get ridiculous on Germany's version of Historical Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, a Celtic farmer isn't terribly keen on plans for Hadrian's Wall, and the brainy pioneers of transportation sing about their inventions.
Read MoreEpisode 9
There is public confusion when King Charles II bans coffee shops, a seasick chicken ruins a Roman sea battle, mighty Egyptian Pharaoh, Ramesses II, meets some smelly peasants on Historical Wife Swap, and a cave-dwelling Stone Age couple try to buy their first house.
Read MoreEpisode 10
A Victorian businessman goes undercover in his own factory, there's a right royal squabble over who should rule medieval England, we meet eccentric Georgian politician Mad Jack Mytton and the Real Tudor Hustle reveals the cleverest con tricks by naughty historical criminals.
Read MoreEpisode 11
DI Bones investigates an unusual Victorian traffic accident, Roman scientist Pliny the Elder suffers a Stupid Death in ancient Pompeii, Prime Ministers Neville Chamberlain and Winston Churchill argue online over what to do about Adolf Hitler, and we discover the horrible history of early Australia.
Read MoreEpisode 12
Featuring a female dinosaur expert who sells seashells down on the seashore, Brian the handsome scientist reveals the weird wonders of the Greek Universe, TV's fastest-talking pensioner, Bob Hale, tries to explain the Space Race between the USA and the USSR, and there's a fitting musical finale to the end of the series.
Read MoreSong Special
Some of history's greatest characters serenade us with tales of their lives. Featuring the all-conquering Alexander the Great, the cash-loving Crassus, the feisty Joan of Arc, the brilliant but miserable Charles Dickens, and the very determined Rosa Parks.
Read MoreMagna Carta Special: Crooked King John and Magna Carta
Horrible Histories returns for a special about King John and Magna Carta, starring Ben Miller. John annoys the Barons and agrees Magna Carta at Runnymede, after a banging rap battle. Meanwhile across the world we meet the formidable Genghis Khan in Mongolia, and catch up with the crafty Saladin during the Crusades. With of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreAwesome Alfred the Great Special
A special episode about King Alfred the Great, starring Tom Rosenthal. Watch Alfred argue with his older brothers then defeat the Vikings using his cunning hit-and-run tactics, summoning the spirit of Ed Sheeran. Meanwhile, across the world, Ant and Dec host a very special Chinese edition of I'm A Celebrity, and the Egyptians tell us how healthcare should really be done. With of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreWicked William the Conqueror Special
A special episode about William the Conqueror, starring Kevin Eldon. We meet young William, Duke of Normandy, as he quarrels with Harold Godwinson about who should be King of England, before bashing the English and taking the crown at the famous Battle of Hastings in 1066! Meanwhile, across the world we discover Chinese technology light years ahead of the dunderheaded Normans and Saxons in England, and meet one of the world's first scientists in Egypt. With, of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreMardy Mary Queen of Scots Special
A special episode about Mary Queen of Scots, starring Jessica Ransom. This episode follows the young Mary as she stumbles from young girl in Scotland to queen in France, back to queen in Scotland and finally to Elizabeth I's public enemy no 1 - with a bit of Queenian Rhapsody thrown in for good measure! Meanwhile, across the world we meet silver-nosed Danish scientist Tycho Brahe, and Mr H gives us his unique take on the epic Battle of Lepanto in another History's Craziest Fools. With, of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreNaughty Napoleon Special
A special episode about the great French leader Napoleon Bonaparte, starring Jim Howick. We follow Napoleon as he rises from humble beginnings to be the Emperor of France, bashing most of Europe along the way, and ultimately meeting his Waterloo at, well, Waterloo! Meanwhile, across the world we meet the Indian traveller who brought shampoo to the world. With of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreHorrid Henry VIII Special
A special episode about King Henry VIII, starring Rowan Atkinson. We meet the young Henry as he struggles with his boring dad Henry VII, before becoming king himself and going through wives like most people go through toothbrushes!
Meanwhile, across the world we meet the great Ottoman leader Suleiman the Magnificent in Turkey, and the mad, bad, and very dangerous to know Emperor Zhengde in China. With, of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreCrafty Cleopatra Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show about the great Egyptian queen Cleopatra, starring Kathryn Drysdale. We meet Cleo as she clashes with her brother, seizes power and hooks up with great Roman leaders Julius Caesar and Mark Antony. Meanwhile, across the world, we catch up with the thoughts of famous Chinese philosopher Confucius and encounter the less glamorous side of life in Rome. With, of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreGorgeous George III Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show about King George III, starring Simon Farnaby. We follow George from a young unpopular king to a much loved figure some 60 years later, and check out a bit of his court life along the way. Meanwhile across the world we hear about some of the words we have got from India, and the Battles of the Day team give us their unique insight into the American Revolution. With, of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreBolshy Boudica Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show, focusing on the great British Queen Boudica, starring Lorna Watson from Watson & Oliver. We follow Boudica as she turns against her Roman masters and unleashes her wrecking ball on Colchester, St Albans and London. It is cut-throat Celts versus rotten Romans - it's going to be very gory! Meanwhile, across the world, we meet famous emperors Caligula and Nero, dishing out their own unique brand of Imperial nastiness. With of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreWily Winston Churchill Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show about Winston Churchill, starring Jim Howick. We follow Churchill from a young soldier in India during the time of Queen Victoria, through the First World War, to victory in World War II, and finally to his retirement in the Swinging Sixties - what a journey! Meanwhile across the world we meet the American soldier literally spreading propaganda around the battlefields, and learn about Gandhi's more eccentric side. With of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreTricky Queen Vicky Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show about Queen Victoria, starring Sarah Hadland. We meet young Vicky as she becomes queen aged only 18, marries her true love Albert, and has to put up with the open sewers at the not-so-luxurious Buckingham Palace. Meanwhile, across the world, we catch up with Australian outlaw Ned Kelly, and discover plans for the Great Hedge of India. Yes, hedge! With of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read More'Orrible Oliver Cromwell Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show about Oliver Cromwell. We follow Oliver as he rises from obscurity, challenges King Charles I in the English Civil War, and ultimately orders the King's execution - as he says, a it was a 'cruel necessity'. In other parts of Britain we meet a bunch of oddly named Puritan soldiers, and the great writers Shakespeare and Milton square up for a word battle. With of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreRotten Rulers Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show featuring all your favourite rotten rulers from the series. Including naughty Napoleon annoying his Josephine and horrid Henry VIII getting married again! There's also a song from wily Winston Churchill and of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
Read MoreIt's a Wicked World Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show, featuring ghastly Genghis Khan, the wise Confucius and a dance-off during a naval battle! There's also a Bollywood number from Queen Victoria. With Rattus to guide the way.
Read MoreSavage Songs Special
A special episode of the historical sketch show, featuring all your favourite songs from the series! Sing along with King Alfred about his burnt cakes, or with Henry VIII about his love of reformation - or get down Norman-style with William the Conqueror. With of course, our host Rattus to guide the way!
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